April 2018

It got ugly fast. You will quickly understand why you need alcohol wedding guidelines at your upcoming Philadelphia area wedding.

Uncle Charlie liked his liquor.  And it flowed at his niece’s wedding reception.  Charlie felt as if  he had entered the land of milk and honey.  (That’s a biblical metaphor for what our culture would call a ‘land of plenty.’)

As the party picked up the pace, so did Charlie’s imbibing, and so did his dancing … and it wasn’t pretty.  I had never seen someone doing Michael Jackson’s moonwalk to “The Way You Looked Tonight.”

He kept dancing after the music had ended.

His shirt was untucked, his eyes, rolling, and his tie was tied around his head instead of his neck. Everyone was embarrassed.  And no one wanted to get back on the dance floor.

When the bride’s father tried to get him off the dance floor, he was belligerent.  As I said, it got ugly fast.

Alcohol wedding guidelines

When planning your wedding reception, think about how you want to handle alcohol.  As a DJ, I have a lot of experience dealing with highly uncomfortable situations at wedding receptions with out-of-control guests under the influence.

It doesn’t have to be that way.

For your sake and mine, I’ve posted some helpful guidelines above regarding booze, beer, and wine.  Based on my experience, these guidelines will eliminate most problems.  I hope you find them helpful.

Some brides can’t afford an open bar, or don’t want to pay for it, which is perfectly fine.  The guidelines above still apply.  Simply replace ‘open’ bar with ‘cash’ bar.

Starlite Entertainment offers helpful wedding planning tools for Montgomery County and Southeast Pennsylvania brides. We’ll provide you logins when you book us. Let us know what alcohol guidelines you’d like for your reception in the “other information” section of the wedding planning form. Be intentional. The purpose of today’s blogpost is to help you to be proactive in your planning efforts.

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Get ready for controversy: babies at weddings. Your friendships are about to be tested, but if you’re prepared, you can minimize the damage.

I refer, of course, to that timeless issue of whether or not to let your friends bring their babies to your Maryland or Virginia wedding.

You face two scenarios when it comes to babies at weddings

SCENARIO #1:  The sweet little things alternate between cooing and napping during your ceremony.

SCENARIO #2:  The little monsters scream to high heaven throughout the wedding ceremony.  You have to ask the officiant to repeat the vows a second and a third time before you can hear them over the din.  All of this is captured by your wedding videographer.  Forever.  And we haven’t even gotten to the reception yet!

Whew!

Okay … scenario #1 is the likely outcome.  Scenario #2 seldom happens, meaning infrequently or almost never.

But sometimes it does.

Here’s what to do:  you know your friends with babies.  Are they reasonable when it comes to their kids?  If their baby/infant/toddler gets fussy during the ceremony, will they discreetly step out to avoid disrupting your event?  Or are they the type that believes the world revolves them, their needs, their convenience, and their kids, who by the way, can do no wrong?

If you expect scenario #1, invite away, but if  not, don’t. And if in doubt, simply remember that this is your day, not theirs.

Most people do view marriage as a community celebration

Many brides and grooms love inviting families, complete with their kids.  Wonderful.  But you don’t have to.

Some brides recognize unique situations.  For example, if guests make a trek in from out of town, it may be tough for them to find someone to come in for the weekend to watch the kid(s), especially if a mother is still nursing her baby.

If you’re willing to include children for these reasons, you might want to make arrangements for a side room with childcare in case your guests would rather park their kids than tend to them during either the ceremony or reception.

If you make the decision that you do not want children, do so with this understanding:

1. It is perfectly just, moral, and practical.
2. You may have a friend/family member ask for an exception.

When sending out invitations, simply address it to the person who is invited:

Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

or…

Bobbi-Jean Smith & Guest

If kids are welcome, you’ll simply address the invitation as Mr. and Mrs. John Smith & Family.

If babies and kids are not invited, inevitably, your friend, Bobbi-Jean, is going to give you a call with this request:

“Say … you wouldn’t mind if I brought little Clarabelle, would you?”

This is key:  know exactly what you want.

Have a prepared response rehearsed and ready to go.

If you’re willing to make exceptions, then life is simple.  You’ll use Response #1:

RESPONSE #1:  “For you, of course.  Little Clarabelle is such a lovely little doll.  Would you like me to make arrangements for a side room and child care to give you more flexibility during the ceremony and/or reception?”

If you really don’t want babies, infants, or children at your ceremony or reception, you’ll want to use something more along the lines of Response #2:

RESPONSE #2:  “You know, we really looked at this closely with our Wedding Planner.  She really encouraged us to keep the event adults only, and we’re taking her advice.  [But she had a great suggestion.  She said if any of our guests wanted to bring kids, we can make arrangements for a side room and provide a list of reputable child care providers for those parents interested in the service.  Would you like me to forward you the list?]”

If you really don’t want to mess with around with kids, only use the first two sentences above and lop off the section in brackets.

If you have a particularly persistent friend or family member, you know the type who begs:

“Pleeez … couldn’t you make a teeny weeny exception for my sweet little Clarabelle.  She won’t make a peep.  You’ll never know she was there.  Pleeez, pretty pleeeeez”…

… be strong.

Stand your ground.

Calmly and without apology, simply say:

“I understand, Bobbi-Jean, but the answer is no.  We have intentionally planned for an all-adult wedding celebration, and we’re going to stick with our plan.”

You may have a better way to say it.  If yes, think it through and be ready in case you’re put in the uncomfortable situation described above.

Remember, this is YOUR wedding.

Okay, are you ready to sketch out your Philadelphia area event? We’ve got the tools right here. Simply complete the contact form, and we’ll provide the logins which give you full access to all of our tools without obligation.